Unexpected

So i didn't get a chance to blog yesterday . Not much happened , besides my first boyfriend ( ex ) , texting me . We ended quietly & badly . We dated twice . Now he texts me off and on asking if i want to hook up . I always say maybe just because i'd feel bad if i didn't . All though we've never hooked up full on . I then told him that the reason why i didn't want to hook up was because i would just want to be with him after . He then confessed to me that he would want to be with me too . We both fell asleep . He texted to tonight and he asked me if i liked him . I responded by of course saying , " I don't know . " . I asked him if he liked me and he said that he firgured i didn't like him and that before i told him i wasn't sure , he was going to ask me out . Until he remembered how much he hates relationships . He clearly does , he refers to them as , " Relationshits " . I replied saying , " aww too bad you didn't " , He never replied . I'm now finding myself thinking about him and what if would be life if we got back together . I wonder if i would be happier then i have been when with other guys . After all when we dated i thought he was my first love . Considering he was my first kiss , first boyfriend, and first boy i ever said i love you too . Maybe i just thought so because i'd never had a boyfriend . But i can't exactly remember how i felt . I just remember feeling nervous everyday . Hmm , is that a sign ? Who knows . I guess we'll know someday . I'm probably just in over my head , althouggh i'm pretty sure i want to get back together .

                                                         CarlyHale<3